Networking Pro-Tip: So What? Tips for Small Talk Mastery

How to start a conversation...how to break the ice...how to make small talk...how to strike fear in a networking neophyte's heart (ok, and perhaps a few experienced networkers too).

Relief is on the way (and not in the form of ridiculous "ice breaker" questions to memorize) - courtesy of Matt Abrahams, an author and lecturer in organisational behaviour at Stanford University.

Structure your small talk in three simple questions:

What? The "what" is a product, idea, service, belief. Or it could be as simple as the reason why you and the other person are attending an event ("what brings you here this evening?").

So what? The "so what", is what is important to the person you're talking to ("why is being part of this group or hearing from this speaker or learning more about this topic, important to you?').

Now what? This is what comes next based the information contained in the "what/so what" answers. It could be sharing an example, or taking questions or suggesting a course of action ("thanks for sharing, that's been my experience too..." or "interesting, can I ask you a couple more questions about that?").

Learn more (as clearly, there is a lot to be said on this subject):

🗝️ Small talk is an art, not a triviality. Here’s how you can master it (Psyche)

🗝️ To avoid ‘awkward, superficial’ small talk, make one little change, says communication expert (CNBC)

🗝️ A guide to mastering small talk with just about anyone, according to experts (CNN)

🗝️ To have deeper conversations, try being more of an asshole (Psyche)

🗝️ How A Conversation With A Stranger Can Bring Perspective And Joy (Does This Make Sense)

🗝️ The Elements of Meaningful Conversation: Fewer Mirror Questions, More Follow-Ups (HBS Working Knowledge)

🗝️ Science Says Talking to Strangers Will Make You Happier: 5 Tips to Get Better at It (Inc.)

🗝️ The new rules of small talk: how to nail every conversation, from first dates to weddings, parties and funerals (The Guardian)